Monday, March 24, 2014

High Bronze and Beyond - How to treat your teammates (Hint: NICELY!!!!)

There are three fundamental views on how to treat your teammates starting from champion select and ending with a nexus explosion. I'll go over the pros and cons of each.

A. The cheerleader approach. From 5 seconds into the game, you are Mister Positive. You let everyone choose their roles, offer to swap, and fill whatever position is needed. Your one and only function in life is to make your teammates happy, regardless of whether you win or lose.

B. The moderate approach. You follow pick order, and will take your role if you're ahead of everyone else. You're polite and patient, but will yell at people for making stupid mistakes (or what you consider to be stupid mistakes - important distinction here). You try to carry the game for your team, but understand that if you're last pick you're going to be the least popular role in that game. You follow these rules because you know that they also apply to others - So next time, when you're first pick, you will get top for example.

C. The trolly approach. You play league to make yourself feel better. Whether it's because you feel inadequate, or want to let off steam after a hard day's work, or just to show that TWELVE YEAR OLD BASTARD HOW TO PLAY HIS F***ING CHAMPION, you do whatever you want, whenever you want. SCREW everyone else. They don't matter as you'll never see them again. Behavior for option C includes the following:

1. Autolocking mid no matter what even as last pick, even if two mids have already locked in.

2. Muting everyone / saying you're muting everyone in every single ranked game.

3. As first pick, asking everyone what their favorite champions are and then banning them.

4. Offering to swap with someone if they give you Soraka, then never actually swapping.

5. Telling everyone on your team that they need to go back to grade school and get off their mommy's computers because you're giving their parents a call.


Optimally, A. is best. HOWEVER, in Bronze, B is actually best. Why? Because even if you give *every single person* on your team their favorite role and champion, they probably suck the D with them. This means you want to be slightly selfish and pick someone you know you can carry with. Because in bronze people will feed, then rage afk because "their jungler, mid and top didn't gank for them" and suddenly that great ADC you had is masturbating in his bathroom. Or whatever it is 14 year old boys do when they're frustrated, idk. Anyway (yes I had a strange childhood).

What does all this mean? Be nice. For god's sakes, you're only going to see these people once in your entire life. Yes that means you can vent freely at them - and I do that AFTER. THE. GAME. - But during the game.. Why not maximize your chances of winning by making your teammates happy? A simple smiley face goes a long way. :-)


Until next time,


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